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MNnancy replied on Fri, May 4 2012 2:02 PM | Locked

Oh, Maddie,  usted es un perro hermoso!

Are you going out to celebrate somewhere?

~Calley


On the banks of the Mississippi River in north central Minnesota (Brainerd lakes area)

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MNnancy replied on Fri, May 4 2012 9:41 PM | Locked

I noticed the moms have a joke thread, so I decided to post a few funnies for us right here! I got these off my dad's "Lumberjocks" forum.  I wonder if his group has a "furbabies of the woodshop" thread.

~Calley

local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, stating the following: “HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.”

A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.

Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager. The office manager looked at the dog and was surprised, to say the least. However, the dog looked determined, so he lead him into the office. Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.

The manager said “I can’t hire you. The sign says you have to be able to type.” The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and proceeded to type out a perfect letter. He took out the page and trotted over to the manager and gave it to him, then jumped back on the chair.

The manager was stunned, but then told the dog “the sign says you have to be good with a computer.” The dog jumped down again and went to the computer. The dog proceeded to enter and execute a perfect program, that worked flawlessly the first time.

By this time the manager was totally dumb-founded! He looked at the dog and said “I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and have some interesting abilities. However, I still can’t give you the job.”

The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his paw on the sentences that told about being an Equal Opportunity Employer. The manager said “yes, but the sign also says that you have to be bilingual.”

The dog looked at the manager calmly and said, “Meow!”

 

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. —Anonymous

Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. —Ann Landers

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. —Will Rogers

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. —Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. —Josh Billings

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. —Andy Rooney

We give dogs time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It’s the best deal man has ever made. —M. Facklam

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go
to heaven, and very, very few persons. —James Thurber

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. —Robert Benchley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. —Rita Rudner

And nobody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. —Franklin P. Jones

If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise. —Unknown

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That’s almost $21.00 in dog money. —Joe Weinstein

Outside of a dog, a book is probably man’s best friend; inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. —Groucho Marx

Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery
store with the most amazing haul—chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!—Anne Tyler

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. – Anon.

 


On the banks of the Mississippi River in north central Minnesota (Brainerd lakes area)

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Nana replied on Fri, May 4 2012 10:09 PM | Locked

These are so cute.   Thanks for sharing Calley.

Pancho

Vinton, Virginia

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safrmaz replied on Sat, May 5 2012 8:19 AM | Locked

I love it, Calley!  Thanks for sharing!

Maddie

 

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Marge (AKA Dimples) replied on Sat, May 5 2012 4:45 PM | Locked

You did so good with your jokes Calley!! 

Mom is critter sitting this weekend 'cause they went camping over at Stone Mountain.  Guess what --- they took Charlie with them.  Man - he gets to have all the fun.  I guess it helps to be little and have the cuteness factor going for you. 

Tempe was so confused this morning.  Mom was too worn out last night after working all day to take us for a walk.  Her knees were really bothering her.  So she took us for a walk before breakfast this morning, while it was still nice and cool out.  Tempe was out in the yard by herself and kept looking over her shoulder for Zoe and Eddie to come out.  It was like she wasn't sure she should be barking at us or not.  :o) 

Mac

Marge (AKA Dimples)

Griffin, GA

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mars92 replied on Sun, May 6 2012 2:02 AM | Locked

Calley-  Mac, Autumn and everyone,

You are so funny!  You can tell jokes, and dance better than anyone!  And I can only drive fast! LOL  I loved all these jokes, and the pics were to die for.  My tummy hurts from laughing so hard. That doggie and his hiney pic was the best! 

Sorry for being so behind. But the long trip cross country and all our partying at retreat made me sleep forever.

Many, many thanks to Mac, Autumn, Necko, and Molly for hosting our retreat. And of course Dave for putting up with all of us and sending out for pizza when I begged him to!  You're so sweet, Dave, no wonder we all loved you!

I miss Tara so much- the trees and all the room to run and play. I feel like I am in a playpen in my backyard!  Did we all have a blast or what? The dancing, and the girls looked so beautiful in their ballgowns and jewels. 

But Mac looked mighty handsome too, in his Tux- as did all the other guys! Oh, you all made my heart go pitter patter! 

I think Calley is still the Dancing Queen though- no one will ever out dance her!  And does she still have the best legs ever?

Princess, you still can strut your stuff and make the boys drool.

Kaci, you can drive a mean machine truck, girl and walk out of it like a lady!

And the kitties, did they ever play at Tara! And climb trees and stick their little tongues out at us and laugh because we couldn't catch them. No fair, no fair. But it was all just in fun. We laughed and when they came down we gave them rides on our backs like pony's, they loved that!

My mom wants to know why the Red Car needs an oil change so soon? I just roll my eyes, roll over and go back to sleep.  <VBG> 

Hugs,

Ms Cricket

 

 

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MNnancy replied on Sun, May 6 2012 6:53 AM | Locked

It's good to hear from you, Ms Cricket.  We were worried that your mom had grounded you because she found out you were gone.  But how could she know? We were so smart not to post pictures from our retreat.  Now no one can threaten to send pictures of our silliness on Facebook or YouTube.

I understand why you are so tired.  You were out on the dance floor with all the boys, and I quit counting how many times you danced with Pancho alone.  You two make such a cute pair!  

Alas, my mani-pedi is wearing off as I return to the same-old/same-old routines around home.  At least it's now swimming weather at the pond.  Dreaming of our next retreat....

~Calley


On the banks of the Mississippi River in north central Minnesota (Brainerd lakes area)

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Nana replied on Sun, May 6 2012 10:46 AM | Locked

Ms Cricket

It is good to see you back on the board.  I have been hoping that you were just resting up from our high adventure.  I loved dancing with you and dream about you every night.  You are the best.

Pancho

Vinton, Virginia

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Marge (AKA Dimples) replied on Sun, May 13 2012 3:32 PM | Locked

Bummer - we hate it when it rains hard. If it just rains "nice", Mom will take us for a walk but when it is raining hard, she always tells us "Not now kids".  :o(   I guess we shouldn't complain 'cause we really needed this rain.  Of course it would start raining as soon as Ed and Chris started working on a project here.  Last night she couldn't walk us because our "un-fur" kin took Mom out to eat.  Restaurants frown on fur babies coming along to dine.  Mom did bring us some goodies.  We LOVE doggie boxes!!!!!

To all the Moms out here ------ Happy Mothers Day  from all the fur babies!!! 

Mac and Autumn  (Molly and Neko too!)

Marge (AKA Dimples)

Griffin, GA

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Linda replied on Tue, May 22 2012 4:20 AM | Locked

Hi Everyone!

I was beginning to think no one survived that retreat!   Hey, the jokes were funny. 

I'll check in with you guys later. Mom is calling me.

Indy

 

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Patti replied on Wed, May 23 2012 8:35 AM | Locked

The Chiliwist chipmunk relocation project has begun.   Monday one moved, yesterday 2, and hopefully a couple more today.  For all you furbabies that love to chase them, they are being released half a mile down from Patti's house.  But you certainly are welcome to hunt on her property as well.  Lots of gophers too.  Patti says we need a resident weasel.  (we have seen them, but even with the owl's help, they aren't keeping up with the population explosion.)

 

Patti

Chiliwist Valley

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MNnancy replied on Wed, May 23 2012 4:40 PM | Locked

Patti:
But you certainly are welcome to hunt on her property as well.  Lots of gophers too.

Oh, oh, then you can come over to our place to continue your gopher hunting.  My friend Scooter the Springer Spaniel says that our yard is infiltrated!  He is digging big holes all over the place trying to remedy the situation.      (Mom is not happy...)

~Calley


On the banks of the Mississippi River in north central Minnesota (Brainerd lakes area)

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Marge (AKA Dimples) replied on Thu, May 24 2012 2:14 PM | Locked

Miss Patti --- maybe you need to call in the big guns.  Where is your friend Dita when you need her????  I would send Neko and Molly to help out but they probably wouldn't know what to do.  They are so spoiled from living indoors.  Now Ms Kitty Kitty and Fuzzy, the two outdoor cats on the "estate"....... those two kitty cats would take care of your problem in a heart beat. 

Marge (AKA Dimples)

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Marge (AKA Dimples) replied on Thu, May 24 2012 2:15 PM | Locked

Only a couple more days now and Mom and Dad will be home.  Big David is nice about taking us for walks but we miss Mom and Dad.  :o(  I wish they would stay at places that like doggies and kitties. 

Mac

Marge (AKA Dimples)

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Marge (AKA Dimples) replied on Mon, Jun 18 2012 5:42 PM | Locked

Hmm - rumor has it that a bunch of the Moms are having another one of those retreat thingies.  Do I sense some furbabies running off to have some fun while the Moms are busy sewing????  Don't miss the opportunity to go and kick up your heels.  :o) 

Mac

Marge (AKA Dimples)

Griffin, GA

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