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Update on Mom's status

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Nana replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 9:30 PM

Angele

Living in constant pain is a real witch.  I had forgotten what it was like to not have pain until after my neck surgery in November.  I haven't had any pain to speak of since.   However it is starting to rear its ugly head with twinges in the knees and hips.   No one has been able to explain why anesthesia would have stopped the RA pain but I will enjoy every minute that I get.   It is really a shame that your friend doesn't have something in her life to give her the strength and courage...or maybe just plain stubborn... to be able to cope with the pain.

Vinton, Virginia

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Thea replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 11:38 PM

Nana - I know what you are talking about with the relief after surgery.  I always thought that they had cured me - I usually had about 60 days of uforia before the pain started coming back.  I had a friend who had lyme disease out in California that was trying to get it approved for a lidocaine drip every 60 days for people with chronic pain that could not be healed.  They did approve it but as far as I know it was on a very limited basis - that would probably be a factor to  sway me to have the back and neck surgeries that they feel that I need.  for the moment though I am saying no - I have developed so many other problems from the surgeries that for the moment it just doesn't tip the scales enough.  I have a Latex allergy from the surgeries that I have had and it is scary at times what happens.  I would however not mind a lidocaine drip anytine.  I have lidocaine patches that work fantastically but I have to be very careful in my use.

 

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ls2116 replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 11:49 PM

Nana & Thea I don't know I you can find this in your area but my neighbor who has multiple schlrosis gave me a jar of arctic ice which we can get from dollar store it is a blue gel you rub in and it warms the muscles and it helps us with our grumpy muscles.  Hope this helps you.

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Nana replied on Thu, Feb 14 2013 9:53 AM

Thea

I saw my Rheumatologist last Friday.  He was amazed that everything was going so well.   I didn't even have painful trigger points.   He laughed when I was leaving and said that we would just put me under anesthesia when the pain came back.   No surgery just anesthesia.   Sounds good to me....LOL

Vinton, Virginia

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Angele replied on Thu, Feb 14 2013 9:10 PM

Thea, will you post a picture of your RR before you send it to Barbara? I think those quilts are quite interesting. Maybe one day I will get one started.

Angèle  from NWO

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Thea replied on Fri, Feb 15 2013 6:51 AM

Angele - I can send you a picture but I can't post a picture on here as Kristie is not to know what we are doing until she gets it back all done.  But I don't have a problem sending you the picture - email me at altheafoster@att.net and I'll send you the picture... although it may be Sunday as I haven't quite got it done... I hope to work on it today.  Yesterday, I spent the day cleaning my house - oh my - so much that I had just tidied each day needed to be really cleaned.  I got my bedroom done and rearranged and It is much better and got the floor in the kitchen stripped and washed and rewaxed - looks nice again - and got the vacuuming done in the back living room under the furniture - Oklahoma isn't called the dust bowl for no reason - so much dust... but it is done... then I started getting sick... not sure if it is from the food we ate... had a want for a hamburger so Jay had gone out and got us take-out - well guess it didn't sit well... I think I have a touch of food poisoning... no fun... headache and temperature today... will not be visiting Mom today - hoping that maybe Jay will go over again - he went yesterday and took her the things I got her for Valentine's day - she was tickled that he would think of her... it makes me happy to make her happy and maybe this will get her out of her funk and up and about.  I keep hoping... otherwise they will be finding a NH that she can afford each month as this one is a little out of our league without medicare paying for part of it.  I was amazed at the cost.  When I stopped in to see her yesterday morning on the way to have my labs done she was just laying there in her bed - not wanting to get up but when Jay got there in the afternoon she got up and sat in her chair to visit with him.  

Head is starting to throb so going to lay back down - turned the TV on in the bedroom and am using my Roku to watch some programs haven't seen in a while - maybe today I'll lay here and catch up on some movies... hoping that I feel better this afternoon... 

 

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Rhonnie replied on Sat, Feb 16 2013 9:45 PM

I do understand about the pan. I would say the best thing I did was my back andneck surgeries. Yes it took me a bit to recoop to where I wanted to be but that is cause with all these critters I didn't follow doctors orders. I over did it every chance I could and if I couldn't I plotted how to over do it as soon as I could. I hated being in pain but the inablity of using my hands made the pain even worse. I still have more pain than I wish but I also haven't stopped over doing it. I am now plotting my acre plus worth of garden to plant, harvest and of course put up. Today we got a beehive to start raising honey bees cause well gee I needed more critters. I got a call today about my chicken order for this spring...my son wants to know if I am buying or is he. I caught DH checking out getting few new goats to add to the herd... we have several expecting twins or triplets and couple that should have singles. So can you imagine why I have pain...I am told its self inflected according to my doctors as I get my prescription filled. They do agree its cheaper than any therapy they could give me *giggles* and I enjoy it.

After reading about the blue stuff it reminded me to tell you about a spray I can get at walgreens called StopPain. Its awesome and helps with several of my aching joints. I will say DH says it doesn't work on his torn rotorr cuff. Ive used it on my knees, back shoulders, neck and anywhere else that hurts. I will suggest a little at first to see what level you want. I think its easier to deal with then the rubs and a lot cleaner. I hate that rub stuff under my nails. I hope this helps. I also hope with spring the pain levels ease up on all...I know this messed up weather is killing us.

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Rhonnie replied on Sat, Feb 16 2013 9:59 PM

Thea.....

How is your mom? I hope things are looking up for her. I hope she enjoys the ladies at the NH and all they have to offer. I know my grandmother enjoys her NH until one day passes someone doesn't stop to see her than she gets on her I'm going home no one ever comes to see me *rolls eyes*.

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ls2116 replied on Sat, Feb 16 2013 10:28 PM

Thea I've been thinking and praying for you and your mom.  I don't always catch your posts but I've been watching for them.

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Thea replied on Sun, Feb 17 2013 12:17 PM

Everyone thank you for your thoughts and prayers - Mom is doing as well I think as can be expected.  I am doing better emotionally - had a talk with myself in the wee hours of this morning - after praying long and hard to the Lord for answers to my problems... I got this over whelming feeling - like that warm fuzzy in the chest - and what I felt was that I am trying again to be responsible for her happiness and that is not my job to do.  I can assist her and let her know that I am here but in the long run it is our own responsibilty to make sure that we are happy.  My Mom has the greatest care possible to get well from this broken hip and it is up to her to take the steps to do it.  Right now and every day it is my responsibility to take care of myself first.  I have not been doing that and have been going down hill fast... so I decided in the wee hours of this morning that I am letting go of the guilt that I can't be over there every day to visit her for hours - that I will stop in and let her know that I am here if she needs me but she has a whole building full of people to talk to and she should do that... 

When I stopped to see her yesterday she was up in her chair and was complaining about everything - she was uncomfortable in her chair - couldn't find a comfortable spot.  She was kind of slumped in the chair so I asked her why she didn't put her pillow behind her - she said I can't - I asked Why not - she said I just can't - I said you could if you wanted to and you have no limitations on movement so I am in a quandry as why you can't do it... I said you might try and get it - she said I don't want to - so I said Okay - I'll be seeing you later... I don't know if she got the pillow herself or not but if they keep doing it for her and she doesn't try to do it herself she will never get better and I will not be her enabler - nor am I going to worry about it.  

I have to let it go!  I have been so stressed about her happiness when she isn't stressed about it at all but happy that I am stressed about it.  

I hope and pray that as I age I do not become like that - have told my son that if I do he will have my written permission to take me out to the back 40 and put a bullet in my head and bury me as I do not want to be a burden to anyone... I am not sure how people become like this - or why - 

Guess you can figure out that she frustrates me to no end... I will continue to visit on a daily basis but I am getting back to taking care of my house and my DH am myself so that I don't completely fall apart.

Again, thank you for all your prayers - you have no idea how much they help me!

 

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ls2116 replied on Sun, Feb 17 2013 12:30 PM

Thea I'm in the same thought I sure don't want to be a burden on my kids maybe the good lord will take me home before .  My FIL though in pain now is one that even when he was walking was very independent you know the boss his way or the highway.  Good luck with all.

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Debbie replied on Sun, Feb 17 2013 12:45 PM

Thea, sounds like the Lord's been talking to you.  set you straight, didn't He as only He can do.  I understand what you mean, can't do for Mom as much as you would like to, won't be what she needs to get better. 

My late DFIL spent almost 10 years in nursing home before he died almost 4 years ago.  He had had a stroke and lost use of his left leg first, DMIL had kept him at home for nearly 5 years before drs wouldn't let her do it anymore.  Last few years, he had aspirating pneumonia tendencies and had plug for eating, couldn't have straight liquids, they put a thickening substance in all his drinks.  It was always hard to go visit him and spend hours up there.  ILs live in Pueblo, CO.  His mind was good, know what was going on. 

In contrast, my mother died almost 6 years ago in her sleep.  She contended with congestive heart failure and Alzeimheimer's for the last 3-4 years of her life..  I think I mentioned before she didn't know me the last three years of her life. 

two sides of the coin and which would I rather be?  I agree about having son shoot me if I got like you say.  But think I would rather not know what's going on then suffer and possibly make others miserable.  I often pray to God that I'll die in my sleep before I get so bad as either of the two.  And hope He hears my prayer and answers my request when the time comes. 

"I'm just a poor soul who's intentions are good.   Oh, Lord, Please don't let me be misunderstood."

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Thea replied on Wed, Feb 20 2013 4:07 PM

Thank you everyone for your prayers - she has not been discharged yet from skilled nursing and they will keep me updated better as to what is happening - i think we are on a better page.  They took her and had her hair cut and curled today so she was extremely happy.  Tomorrow is the podietrist(sp) I can't imagine she will be in a good mood after that - those toenails are going... they creep me out as did her fingernails which they already took care of... 

It was a good meeting I think??? not exactly sure but I did get the go ahead to go to Branson for our vacation/quilt retreat.  So that is good news.  She was lying to me somewhat and not doing the work that the therapists need her to do - she does not want to participate with occupational or speach - but I told her if she wants to come home that she has to.  So we shall see....

So again - thank you for your prayers...

I get an instant headache when I walk in that place - so many scents hitting me and I am allergic to so much - taking a decongestant to see if that will help and then going to work on Christine's month 11 of her BOM that I am doing... the blocks have gotten easier after month 7 and 8 - month 10 and 11 have been only 8 blocks each and right around 20 pieces in each - easy peasy after what I did for 7 and 8... much better... 

Well, that is the report for now...

 

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Sukochi replied on Wed, Feb 20 2013 4:37 PM

Praise God. He is GOOD. He keeps His promises. Prayer will continue and happy, cheerful thoughts haeded your way. The sun will come up, tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar!  :D

Sukochi

 

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Ginny replied on Wed, Feb 20 2013 7:53 PM

Thea, glad to hear that things went well with your meeting at the NH.  Great news that you will be abe to go to Branson, I'm jealous.   Ginny

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