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Joke/Inspiration of the Day #3

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 2:57 PM

Anyone care to join me in practice?  :  )

Subject: will you do this at 86?



Millbury, MA

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 3:15 PM

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 3:18 PM

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weezee56 replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 3:35 PM

Marie, I couldn't do that when I was 26.

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Nana replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 4:58 PM

Marie

I couldn't do that even when I had gymnastics in school....LOL....and we won't even go into how many years ago that was.

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Ginny replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 6:15 PM

I'm afraid that I won't be joining you in the acrobatic routine, Marie.  I never could do any of that and sure can't now.  But she is fantastic.  I wish that I were somewhat close to being that limber.   Ginny

 

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 7:21 PM

Me neither  wheeze.

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 7:24 PM

Sorry weezee spellcheck stinks sometimes.

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Marie replied on Sat, Aug 24 2013 7:30 PM

Nana and Ginny, I think I might skip practice also, looks boring!  :  )

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Marie replied on Mon, Aug 26 2013 12:08 PM

Chemo Day
            Some will say you will  pray because it is a nice thing to say or it is politically correct.  Then there are those of you who will get down on your knees and  really do it. I'm sending this to some who  will.
         This prayer means so  much so please say the prayer for everyone and pass it  on.

Cancer is a strange cell.  
     If  you ever have it, you will never be  free of it. If you never had it, don't feel too cozy, you can get  it. Pray for the day there will be a permanent cure.

A SMALL  REQUEST...

93% won't forward, but I'm Sure You Will. 
A  small request.....Just one line

Dear God, 
I pray that You will guide someone to find a cure for cancer in 2013  ....
Amen
 
         All  you are asked to do is keep this circulating, Even if it's only to  one more person. In memory of anyone you know who has been struck  down by cancer or is still living with it. 
A Candle Loses  Nothing by Lighting Another Candle.

Please Keep This Candle  Going!
 

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Marie replied on Tue, Aug 27 2013 10:53 AM


    NOW SHE IS A TEACHER!!!

In September of 2005, on the first day of school, Martha Cothren, a History teacher at Robinson High School in Little Rock, did something not to be forgotten.  On the first day of school, with the permission of the school superintendent, the principal and the building supervisor, she removed all of the desks in her classroom. When the first period kids entered the room they discovered that there were no desks.  'Ms. Cothren, where are our desks?'
 
She replied, 'You can't have a desk until you tell me how you earn the right to sit at a desk.' 
    
    They thought, 'Well, maybe it's our grades.'  'No,' she said. 
    'Maybe it's our behavior.' She told them, 'No, it's not even your 
     behavior.' 
    
And so, they came and went, the first period, second period, third period. Still no desks in the classroom. Kids called their parents to tell them what was happening and by early afternoon television news crews had started gathering at the school to report about this crazy teacher who had taken all the desks out of her room. 
    
The final period of the day came and as the puzzled students found seats on the floor of the desk-less classroom. Martha Cothren said, 'Throughout the day no one has been able to tell me just what he or she has done to earn the right to sit at the desks that are ordinarily found in this classroom. Now I am going to tell you.' 
  
At this point, Martha Cothren went over to the door of her classroom and opened it. Twenty-seven (27) U.S. Veterans, all in uniform, walked into that classroom, each one carrying a school desk. The Vets began placing the school desks in rows, and then they would walk over and stand alongside the wall. By the time the last soldier had set the final desk in place those kids started to understand, perhaps for the first time in their lives, just how the right to sit at those desks had been earned. 
  
Martha said, 'You didn't earn the right to sit at these desks. These heroes did it for you. They placed the desks here for you. They went halfway around the world, giving up their education and interrupting their careers and families so you could have the freedom you have.  Now, it's up to you to sit in them. It is your responsibility to learn, to be good students, to be good citizens. They paid the price so that you could have the freedom to get an education. Don't ever forget it.' 
  
By the way, this is a true story. And this teacher was awarded Veterans of Foreign Wars Teacher of the Year for the State of Arkansas in 2006. She is the daughter of a WWII POW. 

Do you think this email is worth passing along so others won't forget either, that the freedoms we have in this great country were earned by our U.S. Veterans?  .................. I did.
 
  
Let us always remember the men and women of our military and the rights they have won for us. 
  
Blessings abound in our USA! 

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Marie replied on Tue, Aug 27 2013 10:57 AM

 The Goldberg Brothers - The Inventors of the Automobile Air
> >>> > Conditioner
> >>> >
> >>> > Here's a little fact for automotive buffs or just to dazzle your
> >>> > friends.
> >>> >
> >>> > The four Goldberg brothers, Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Maxwell,
> >>> > invented and developed the first automobile air-conditioner.. On
July
> >>> > 17, 1946, the temperature in Detroit was 97 degrees.
> >>> >
> >>> > The four brothers walked into old man Henry Ford's office and
> >>> > sweet-talked his secretary into telling him that four gentlemen
were
> >>> > there with the most exciting innovation in the auto industry wince
the
> >>> > electric starter.
> >>> >
> >>> > Henry was curious and invited them into his office. They refused
and
> >>> > instead asked that he come out to the parking lot to their car.
They
> >>> > persuaded him to get into the car which was about 130 degrees,
turned
> >>> > on the air conditioner and cooled the car off immediately.
> >>> >
> >>> > The old man got very excited and invited them back to the office,
> >>> > where he offered them $3 million for the patent.
> >>> > The brothers refused, saying they would settle for $2 million, but
> >>> > they wanted the recognition by having a label, 'The Goldberg
> >>> > Air-Conditioner,' on the dashboard of each car in which it was
> >>> > installed.
> >>> >
> >>> > Now old man Ford was more than just a little anti - Semitic, and
there
> >>> > was no way he was going to put the Goldberg's name on two million
> >>> > Fords.
> >>> >
> >>> > They haggled back and forth for about two hours and finally agreed
on
> >>> > $4 million and that just their first names would be shown.
> >>> >
> >>> > And so to this day, all Ford air conditioners show Lo, Norm, Hi,
and
> >>> > Max -- on the controls.
> >>> >
> >>> > I can hear your groans from here.  Just forward it!

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Nana replied on Tue, Aug 27 2013 1:45 PM

Marie

Loved the first one.  Lo, norm. hi. and max was just a bit too corny....LOL

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Marie replied on Wed, Aug 28 2013 3:30 PM

Worth posting again!
  A  mature lady gets pulled over for  speeding.. 

Older  Woman:
  Is there a problem, Officer?   
Traffic Cop:
  Yes ma'am, I'm afraid you were speeding.                                
Older  Woman:  Oh, I see.
Traffic Cop:  Can I see your license please? 

Older  Woman:
  Well, I would give it to you but I don't have one.  

Traffic Cop:
  Don't have one? 

Older  Woman:
  No. I lost it 4 years ago for drunk driving.  

Traffic Cop:
  I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.  

Older  Woman:
  I can't do that. 

Traffic Cop:
  Why not? 

Older  Woman:
  I stole this car. 

Traffic Cop:
  Stole it? 

Older  Woman:
  Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.  

Traffic Cop:  You what!?
Older  Woman:  His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see  

The traffic cop looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car while calling for back up.  Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer  slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.  


Officer  2:
  Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle  please! The  woman steps out of her vehicle.  

Older  woman:
  Is there a problem sir? 

Officer  2:
  My colleague here tells me that you have stolen this car and  murdered the owner. 

Older  Woman:
  Murdered the owner? Are you serious?!

Officer  2:
  Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car,  please. 

The  woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty  trunk.
  

Officer  2:
  Is this your car, ma'am? 

Older  Woman:
  Yes, here are the registration papers. The traffic cop is quite stunned.  

Officer  2:
  My colleague claims that you do not have a driving license.  

The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch  purse and hands it to the officer. 

The officer examines the  license quizzically.  


Officer  2:
  Thank you ma'am, but I am puzzled, as I was told by my officer here that you didn't have a  license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner! 

Older  Woman:
  Bet the lying *** told you I was speeding,  too.  

Don't  Mess With Mature Ladies

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Bonita replied on Wed, Aug 28 2013 5:00 PM

Good one Marie.

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