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Update on Mom's status

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Kris replied on Sat, Feb 9 2013 9:20 AM

Thea:
so I made a comment about maybe she would end up wanting to stay there and not come home - she said could she have Cocoa there and I said no that they would allow her to visit but she couldn't stay - she said that was the deciding factor - and that she missed Jay and I... so then she said she is going to work hard to be able to get up and about.  

She did good...

This is good to hear Thea.

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Kris replied on Sat, Feb 9 2013 9:22 AM

Nana:
Oh my Thea.  I want to see Barbara coming into retreat with you thrown over her shoulder.   I am not sure but I think you are taller than Barbara and I just picture you with your head dragging on the floor with Barbara waddling thru the door with cane in one hand and you in the other.....ROFLOL.

Now that I'd pay to see. LOL.

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Debbie replied on Sat, Feb 9 2013 9:24 AM

Great news, Thea!  I know liking a place can be so important for their overall well-being.  Dad had to put my Mom in a nursing home when she ended up in the hospital and she was only there a month, but they called ambulance out three times to take her to the hospital, she said she couldn't breathe.  Last time, Dad took her home.  She didn't want to be there and after drs told Dad she wouldn't last 6 months she died in her sleep one afternoon 2.5 years later.  Only God knows when its our time.  Just enjoy Mom while you got her.  Mine's been gone over 5 years now and she didn't know me the last two yearsof her life.  Momma, I miss you! 

"I'm just a poor soul who's intentions are good.   Oh, Lord, Please don't let me be misunderstood."

Debbie (dear1953)  

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Thea replied on Sun, Feb 10 2013 1:56 AM

Mom is doing well - we stopped over to see her and she was asleep - we woke her and I gave her a cinnamon roll I had made fresh to treat her with - she had problems with the new headset could not figure out how to turn it on so we showed her again - and left it on when we left - rather change the batteries then keep trying to teach her - a woman who has an IQ over 200 and the tittle things just don't make sense.

Her best friend - Hilda - I think I asked for prayers for her about a week before Mom broke her hip - well anyway, I got the call today that the Lord had called Momma Hilda back to live with him - she is now out of pain and enjoying her new celestial body - I am very sad and happy at the same time.  Hilda had smoked for years and had problems quitting - she developed lung cancer and had a terrible time the last years of her life with the cancer.  A good reason for those who are still smoking to quit... just hearing about Hilda would have made me quit if I still was a smoker but I have been smoke free now for 17 years.  I don't know what I would do if I still smoked with all the rest of my health issues.

But I am resting this evening - I sewed all day long on Kristie's border for her quilt and am not even done with one side.  But I am well on my way - at least I know what I am doing.  

I am not going to tell Mom about her friend - they met as freshmen in college and have been best friends since - over 60 years and I don't think that this would be a good thing.  She won't notice till she comes home that the cards from Hilda every few days have stopped.  But in her fragile state I don't think this would be a good thing.  She is doing well and mentally is back with us.  Some day maybe I will tell her - then again maybe never.... 6 of one 1/2 dozen of the other

 

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Barbara replied on Sun, Feb 10 2013 6:01 AM

Thea I'm sorry to hear of your mothers firends passing , I know they have ben freinds for many years. I tickled to hear Mom is doing well . and that she likes her new chair. Please let her know wthers are thinking of her . Barbara

Liberty,Missouri

EAT!! SLEEP !! QUILT!!

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Ginny replied on Sun, Feb 10 2013 9:22 AM

Thea, you sound so much better and so does your Mom.  I agree with you about not telling Mom about her friend right now.  That is a decision you can make later.   Have a great day.     Ginny

 

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Thea - since I don't get on the computer much  lately, I missed all this about your Mom.  Obviously she has been in the hospital and now in a nursing facility.  It sounds like she has had "issues" with Ativan as did my DH when he was battling GBS.  He became very abusive and violent and doesn't remember any of it.  It certainly sound like things are going much better for your Mom now.  God Bless!!!!!

Marge (AKA Dimples)

Griffin, GA

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Angele replied on Sun, Feb 10 2013 6:15 PM

Thea, I'm glad things are looking up for your Mom. Now you will be able to sleep and rest at night knowing Mom is getting the best care for now.  Soon she will be back home with you. I'm also so happy you are sewing again. It had been quite a while! It is sad that Hilda won't be around to connect with your Mom, but I think you are right to wait until she is stronger or until she asks for her friend. Then you will have to make a decision.

prayers are still going your way on the Internet wave.  May He carry you and Jay through this time and also help your Mom work through it all.

big hugs,

Angèle  from NWO

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gini replied on Sun, Feb 10 2013 7:07 PM

thea,  you sound much more relaxed, i'm glad things are looking better.

gini in north idaho

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Thea replied on Mon, Feb 11 2013 1:10 AM

Yes, Gini - it seems that with this scare that my Mom decided to not be nasty and that she really wasn't ready to give up on life and once we got her off the anti psychotic meds that she was really there.  I think if we could find a way for her to have her little dog at the NH that she would want to stay.  She is enjoying going down to the main room to eat with the other ladies.  And enjoying the entertainment that they put on.  I am not sure yet how long she will be there - but keep your fingers crossed that it is after the 8th of March- if not - it will be difficult to come to Branson - but I am still hopeful - they don't have a clear picture yet exactly how long it will take - I know the first time frame is 20 days - but not sure if that means 20 days - M-F or S-S - since they don't do any work with her on the weekend I am hoping it is M-F - if so we will go through that first week of March without a problem - I hope to get some answers tomorrow -

I did visit with her today - and have done some preparation work that I will be able to take tomorrow so that I won't get behind on the RR - I am doing some paper piecing in the blocks I am making so have them ready for trimming... and then have some others ready to glue the 1st piece on... trying to have things to do there so I won't get behind here - I have to work on Christine's quilts too...

January is not a good month and this year February is being just as bad... the ups and downs with the temperature - the barometric pressure - they all play havoc with my RA...

I have had a small break since Mom went in the hospital in not having to make meals each day and that has helped... I am hopeful that tonight I will maybe get a good night sleep...hopeful???  I just ache so much that I have to wait till complete exhaustion takes over or I go and lay down and just hurt and sleep wont' come - soon... soon...  I saw an ad on TV for some new stuff to help one sleep and am going to try it... we shall see - can't take sleeping meds - I sleep walk on them - so over the counter meds are my only choice and most don't help... we shall see...

 

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Angele replied on Tue, Feb 12 2013 12:13 PM

Thea as I was reading your post, I was thinking, here at the NH they have a daytime program where the seniors can go a few times a week so their family can either have a break or run their errands with no worries.  There is also a short term respite program, where your mom could stay for a week at a time.  It might be things you have to consider. Especially if she enjoys talking with the ladies there, she might enjoy meeting them a few times a week.

I will  continue to pray for both of you. You are in my heart and here is my quilty ((((HUG)))) for you.

Angèle  from NWO

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Thea replied on Tue, Feb 12 2013 3:09 PM

Angele - we tried to get her out of the house when she first moved here to visit at the Senior Center and she said absolutely NO... was not interested... but I am hopeful now that she is there that she might like to get out and meet people and do things with them  This is a retirement town - and they have lots for the seniors to do- we had told her that anything she wanted to do that I would transport her but her constant response was No ... 

I didn't get over to see her today!  It is snowing hard here .  I had a doctor's appointment early this afternoon so had to get ready for that this morning and the waiting for my prescriptions to be filled.  when I left to go to the appt it was lightly snowing - when I came out it was snowing hard so decided to just come home.  i did call and she is doing okay - I asked them to change her TV channel to the Westminster Dog show this evening as she will love that - after she retired from teaching she showed / raised and bred Lhasa Apsos - she traveled the world doing it and loves the dog shows.

I have a terrible headache today - taking some tylenol and going to lean back for a while - reading a quilt magazine and dreaming of some quilts I want to make - and hoping that I feel well enough this evening to work some more on Kristi's quilt - and get back to month 8 for Christines civil war journal quilt - - and I have to finish up Reese's birthday quilt.  

but for now I am going to lay back and rest my head.

 

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Angele replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 8:26 AM

Thea, I too hope that your Mom will agree to go visit with other seniors.  It would do her a world of good and would give you both something to talk about.  From what I read, her house hasn't sold yet. I'm sorry, I had thought it would be all done by now.  This is also causing you quite some stress.

you impress me so much.  You continue to work on things you love through your pains, and I think they are quite intense. One of my friends quit after she had back surgery and she felt it wasn't where she thought she should be. So now she lives in constant pain, is unable to work and is not even 50 yet.  I guess what upsets me in her case is that most of it she could have prevented. I love her to bits , but I know that her level of pain tolerance is low, she says so herself. She knows what she could do to improve her overall well being but is not willing to go through the process. Sadly I think she quit on life after her DB committed suicide. She was never the same after.

on a cheerier note I am going downstairs and try to sew. This cold wont keep me down forever!!!

Angèle  from NWO

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Sukochi replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 8:48 AM

Thea, I just had a tought this a.m. One I am sure you have already considered. Do you have a large Senior group in your church.I think your Mom would really benefit from spending time with people her age,w ho have medical problems, and have had to lose their homes, as well.  It would be of benefit to her, to heard waht they say.

In Atlanta, there are Adult Day Care places. You drop off your sneior for a day of fun, fellowship and motivation. Do you have such a think there. Sticking a TV in front of her will not do the trick. She needs others in her situation to talk to.

I pray for all of you. You don't mention the toll this must take on Jay. I am sure this is not easy for hom, either. There is an answer, you just need to find it.

Perhaps, having little tea partys for some of the senior ladies in your church would get your mom talking to them. She needs a friend there.

Just drawing straws. I salute you for all you have, in your life ,to bear, and yet you do it with such class and perserverence.

Sukochi

 

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Thea replied on Wed, Feb 13 2013 8:54 PM

 

Today she was completely faded out... she didn't perk up until I was leaving... it is so hard to see her like this.

I am so sorry about your friend.  Yes, I could have checked out a long time ago - my doctors are amazed at the tolerance for pain that I have - I can say that a couple times I have thought about taking the easy way out but then think about all I would be missing with watching my grands grow up and the knowledge that I could give them if able to.  Plus, I want to be around when they find a cure and cure me.  

I was tested about 8 years back for pain tolerance and for when I started feeling pain - I, at that time, could feel a pin just off of my skin.  And I could take that zapping of the nerves up to a high level.  I just blank it out after the initial pain starts.  They also sent me to a mind study thing to help me tolerate pain more.  You did things with your brain - it was fun and I truly would have liked to do more of it but the study was cancelled after 6 weeks - but controlling things just with my brain was neat.  

I saw my doctor yesterday and she was upset with me - I have lost another 10 lbs and although I still can afford to lose about 30 more the fact that I am losing it and not dieting is bothering her... so I have to go in for a battery of blood tests... my thyroid levels were low on the last test so another battery of those this time - plus the kidney and liver tests... So tomorrow when I get up I will go in for the fasting tests... 

She did have an idea about what may have caused my chest pain though - inflammation in the chest bones... hadn't thought about that - had thought maybe the RA had started in my ribs which we aren't ruling out yet... and then I have to have x-rays of the lungs again - 

It is too bad that your friend couldn't find something to snap her into wanting to live.  I am what they call an A personality... I go go go - it is truly difficult for me to sit still - I find things to do while sitting and resting my body - like writing on this computer - or tracing embroidery patterns for quilts - or embroidering itself.  I can never figure out how someone can just sit and stare into space or sit and just watch TV - I hardly ever am doing nothing...

I truly wish my Mom would have a will to live - but I think in her place I wouldn't be fighting too much either - she can't do much - her eyes are shot - she can't hear very well and all her friends are gone... she has a lonely existence - but if it was me - i would want to do something for my family - and this is a foreign idea to my Mom - she has never done anything for anyone but herself - so now she doesn't know what to do... and the Lord isn't taking her yet.  I think she will end up staying in a nursing home until he does call her home - but I will hope and pray that somehow she finds the will to work hard so that she can come home... but she can't come until she can take care of herself... and that just means dressing and making her way to the bathroom... not much but something.

I hope you have had a cheery day sewing - I managed to finish the border on my RR and am looking at it to see whether i want to add one more piece or not - tomorrow I will do the final pressing on it - take it over for Mom to see and then package it up and figure out how to print postage to go on the box and mail it to Barbara... Moving along... 

 

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