Joke/Inspiration of the Day #2

services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in 

the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled: 'Stop! Acts 

2:38!' (I.e., "Repent and be Baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so 

that your sins may be forgiven.")

The burglar stopped dead in his tracks. The woman calmly called the 

police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar: 

'Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell scripture 

to you.'

'Scripture?' replied the burglar. 'She said she had an Ax and Two 38s!'

Knowing scripture can save your life - in more ways than one!

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A Baptist pastor was presenting a children's sermon during the 

service. During the sermon, he asked the children if they knew what the 

resurrection was.  Now, asking questions during children's sermons is 

crucial, but at the same time, asking children questions in front of a 

congregation can also be very chancy.

Having asked the children if they knew the meaning of the 

resurrection, a little boy raised his hand. The pastor called on him 

and the little boy said, "I know that if you have a resurrection that 

lasts more than four hours you are supposed to call the doctor."

It took over ten minutes for the congregation to settle down 

enough from their laughter for the worship service to be continued.