Top 10 Posters

Joke/Inspiration of the Day #2

Page 23 of 59 (879 items) « First ... < Previous 21 22 23 24 25 Next > ... Last » | RSS

rated by 0 users
This post has 878 Replies | 28 Followers

Top 75 Contributor
Female
Posts 1,355
Points 31,965
MaxNTopeka replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 1:47 PM | Locked

Spudgrandma:

I should have marketed my hubby, we could be retired and living high on the hog now... :)

Spud,  would the smell have been worth it?   Don't know how your DH was, but we'd have to put my DH in another state if he was going that long without a break!

Gini,  I've had the pleasure of raising pigs.  I always thought they were smiling about the beer I gave them once a week. Now I know what they were really smiling about!!

The things we learn....

Max

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 9,443
Points 127,604
Spudgrandma replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 2:11 PM | Locked

MaxNTopeka:
Spud,  would the smell have been worth it? 

Had the smell, so the money would have been nice...:)

Life is like a quilt...bits & pieces, joy & sorrow, stitched with love

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 27,704
Points 436,475
Nana replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 2:13 PM | Locked

Gini

I love it.  I wonder which pig they talked to to find out about the 30 minute orgasm???

Vinton, Virginia

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 75 Contributor
Female
Posts 1,355
Points 31,965
MaxNTopeka replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 3:03 PM | Locked

Nana,

I bet it was the male pig...he would have lied about it!

Max

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 13,251
Points 172,988
Marie replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 4:24 PM | Locked

Gini, Nana and Max, you guys are crazy and I love it.  I belong to a group called "The Pigs", does that mean I should've had one that long too cause I missed that if I shoulda.  Heck, I forgot, I joined that group after Jack passed so that's why I missed it.  

Millbury, MA

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 75 Contributor
Female
Posts 1,422
Points 23,795
Maggie replied on Fri, Oct 26 2012 4:31 PM | Locked

You all are too funny!   Thanks for the laughs!

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 50 Contributor
Female
Posts 1,971
Points 27,675
Ramona replied on Sun, Oct 28 2012 2:49 PM | Locked

Marie:

This is one of those W O W moments!
How did anyone think to figure this out and then do this?  
 

 

 

That is amazing!

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 50 Contributor
Female
Posts 1,971
Points 27,675
Ramona replied on Sun, Oct 28 2012 2:54 PM | Locked

Haven't really been on in about a week and you gals are so funny. Giving me a few well needed chuckles today.

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 500 Contributor
Posts 115
Points 2,475
Clare replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 12:15 AM | Locked

  • | Post Points: 65
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 28,297
Points 414,019
gini replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 2:05 AM | Locked

good one claire

gini in north idaho

  • | Post Points: 20
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 13,251
Points 172,988
Marie replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 9:11 AM | Locked

A LITTLE LONG  but worth the effort.
 
HELL EXPLAINED
BY A CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a  University  of Arizona  chemistry mid-term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. 

 
The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:  

 
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? 

 
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

 
 One student, however, wrote the following:  
 First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

  
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

 
This gives two possibilities:  

  
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.  
  2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?  
If we accept the postulate given to me by Anabella during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct..... ....leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Anabella kept shouting 'Oh my God.'
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
 
 

Millbury, MA

  • | Post Points: 50
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 13,251
Points 172,988
Marie replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 9:13 AM | Locked

Clare, how true it is!  Love it!

Millbury, MA

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 25 Contributor
Female
Posts 4,642
Points 65,380
Bonita replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 8:39 PM | Locked

Marie you get an A + for that one.

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 27,704
Points 436,475
Nana replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 8:45 PM | Locked

Love it Clare.

Vinton, Virginia

  • | Post Points: 5
Top 10 Contributor
Female
Posts 27,704
Points 436,475
Nana replied on Mon, Oct 29 2012 8:48 PM | Locked

Marie

Great one.

Vinton, Virginia

  • | Post Points: 20
Page 23 of 59 (879 items) « First ... < Previous 21 22 23 24 25 Next > ... Last » | RSS
Have a Question? | About Us | Privacy Policy | Join Today © 2014 F+W All rights reserved.
By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use