Musings of a crazy quilter
Yesterday out of the blue:
DS, age 13: I am out of shorts. I mean I have only one pair of shorts that fit.
This pair. These are the only ones that fit me anymore. These are the
ONLY ones I wear. Me: So why are all those other shorts in the laundry? DS: Because I tried them on and they don't fit. I decided to save my reply for another day.
So today I bring home 12 pairs of shorts (you KNOW I got a deal) mostly
in two different sizes but the 12th in a third size because I really
have no idea what size he wears now. Me: Well, I....
DS: Oh my gosh. Mom. Why do you do this to me? Don't buy me anything
unless I tell you to. I did not tell you to buy me anything. Why do you
do this? I am telling you, DON'T buy me anything anymore. Don't even
show me those denim shorts. I do not wear denim shorts. Don't EVEN ask
me to try them on because I won't. Me: Well, you don't have to
try on the denim shorts. But I do want you to try on the other shorts
because I am not sure what size you wear. DS: I wear EXACTLY
one size bigger than these. Just get me some EXACTLY one size bigger
than these. You know what size these are so get me some one size bigger.
Me: (Thinking I have no idea what size those particular shorts are nor
the brand.) Look, here are a pair with skulls on them would you wear
them? DS: I told you I am not going to try on any shorts. Those
are okay. I would wear them. But don't ask me to try on any denim
shorts because there is NO WAY I am going to wear them. Me: Well you need to try these on so we can figure out what size you wear. DS: Okay. Just put them on my bed and I will try those on. But not the denim ones. Me: Here are some camo shorts. (Wondering if camo is still cool.) Do you think you could wear some camo shorts? DS: Yes. I said just put them on the bed and I will try them on.
Me: (confused) Okay, well I will need to see how they fit in the waist
when you try them on. Here are a pair of khaki's and a plaid pair; do
you like these? DS: Yes, just put them on the bed and I will try on a pair.
Me: That's great. I need you to try on all the sizes so I know what
will fit, so you will have to try on more than one pair. (I am excited
that he said he would actually try them on but I can't show how pleased I
am because that would totally backfire on me.) DS: (Now
pawing through the small pile of clothing I handed him.) Are you
kidding, Mom? Seriously? These pajamas have DINOSAURS on them. How old
do you think I am? I can't wear DINOSAURS! Me: (To myself: But
they were on sale.) Well, you can wear them anyway. I am tired of you
hanging around the house in just your underwear. You need to have some
clothes on at all times now. You can wear them when you are hanging out
at home. Nobody will see them. DS: What are THESE? Me: Last year you said you needed special shorts to wear under your PE shorts. I thought these might work. DS: The PE guy said those aren't right. THESE are the right kind.
Me: (Silently: Yay! I got something right!) Well, try this stuff on
now, so I know what I can take back to the store so I can get my money
back. (Although I wanted to smack him - in a kind and loving sort of
way, honest! - I turned my back and walked away. I decided to do some
laundry and hoped he would actually try everything as I had asked.) DS: Okay, they fit. They are all the same size so I don't need to try on any more. These are perfect. Me: Well, let me see the waist.
DS: (Holding up his shirttail barely above the waist which clearly
demonstrates that this size is not going to fit for more than a couple
of weeks of this growth spurt) See, they are fine. Me: Okay.
Try on the others, please. I need to know how they are going to fit so
when it comes time to buy jeans I can get the right size. DS: (Having tried on another pair of shorts.) Okay, I tried them all on. I'm DONE. Me: Well, it turns out none of those are this other size. Would you try on this pair for me so I can compare the fit? DS: Mom. Those are DENIM. I don't wear DENIM. I am not trying them on. Me: Just try them on for size. DS: I am not going to wear them. I don't wear denim shorts.
Me: I am not asking you to keep them. I am taking them back to the
store. Just let me see if these fit better than the others. (They do.
Mental note: THIS is the size to buy.) Thank you. DS: I TOLD you not to buy me anything unless I ask. Just don't buy me ANYTHING unless I tell you.
Since pulling out my own hair would be less painful, next time, NEXT
time I just might do that. Ha! As if. I wish I had the will power to NOT
buy something when I know he needs it. But then, with such an enormous
demonstration of gratitude, why do I bother?
OMG. I love this. My son is 20 now, but I remember those days. Then we went through a phase where he only liked a select few things when we went shopping together, but later would complain that he didn't have very many clothes. I said "that's because you are so darn picky!" Just to let you know, you won't win. I am making progress but I doubt I will be able to buy the "right" thing until he is about 30 or so. lol
Greenmonstr, I agree. I thought the girls were tough, but at least they would actually go shopping with me. This one will not go near a store at all if he can avoid it. But he knows jeans and shoe shopping day is coming soon because those are the two things he absolutely must try on at the store and we always do that before school starts. I am really looking forward to that day. lol